Being Too Scared To Start Achieving Your Goals

achieving your dreams, insecurities, scared of failure, starting your own business, dream job, dream life, entrepreneurs, this stuff is golden, self doubt, self esteem,

I have a lot of goals in life. A LOT.

I want to:

  • write a novel
  • have a successful online business
  • open my own gluten free cafe/bakery
  • have a childcare business
  • be a paid writer for an online magazine (or several)
  • write children’s books
  • etc.

But for the most part, I am simply too scared of failure to get started with any of them.

Sure, I will sit down, have a little brainstorm about what I could do in regards to the online business, or pitch to a few magazines every now and again, but that productivity tends to run dry pretty quickly.

My voice of self-doubt comes crashing in, telling myself that I’m being ridiculous, that these successes will never come my way because I lack a) the talent, b) the knowledge, c) the resources, d) the drive or e) all of the above.

I then give up on any little progress I have made until weeks or months later, when I have finally found some refreshing motivation or inspiration in form of a success story online.

This cycle repeats itself every now and again, depending on the goal I am trying to focus on.

I fear failure, but I won’t let it stop me. Sometimes you just got to do it or else it just doesn’t happen.
– Mark Cuban

Often I come across some lifestyle coaches – glamorous entrepreneurial women who somewhat promise that they can show anybody how to create the ‘life that you’ve always dreamed of’ and I am mostly sceptical.

I’m sure that a lot of these entrepreneurs have indeed helped lots of people reach their goals and succeed in whatever sector they desire, but can anybody really do it? Can I really do it?

There seems to be a lot to learn and so much to do that I have no idea how to, but is that the real reason I’m scared? Am I actually scared because if I really, truly, give it all I’ve got, there’s still a large risk of failure? Probably.

Believe you can and you’re halfway there.
– Theodore Roosevelt

The goals I want to focus on at the moment are the online business and the novel. In an attempt to motivate/guilt myself into writing more fiction, I created a fictional writing tracker in my bullet journal, with the very reasonable goal word-count of 5,000. And guess what? I started off well, then lost all confidence. I only have about 1,500 words written and it’s almost at the 5,000 word deadline (the end of May). But I guess it’s better than nothing, right?

In terms of an online business, I cannot figure out what I could actually sell that not only would create profits but would be something that I actually love to do, make and sell. I’ve had plenty of ideas in the past but have dropped them all pretty quickly. My self-doubt is a fast mover.

It always seems impossible until it’s done.
– Nelson Mandela

I would love somebody to tell me the magic formula, to tell me EXACTLY what I need to do and how to do it, but that just isn’t how life goes. With my baby on the way (only 6 months left) I am putting even more pressure on myself to get something going, to get my goals on track, to make myself proud.

There’s that famous quote by Mark Twain:

The secret of getting ahead is getting started.

It’s such a logical and simple sentence, yet seems so overwhelming. Where do I start? What’s the first step? What’s the step after that? How do I know I’m doing it right? I suppose those questions are the kinds of things I need to ignore. If I wanna do as Mark Twain says, I need to just go with my gut and give it a shot – leave the questions til later.

Wish me luck.

8 Comments

  • Totally agree. I’m considering a big step at the moment and am thinking just of taking the first step and letting things unfurl from there. Thinking too far ahead means you can find too many reasons not to even start.

    • Lauren says:

      That’s so true – it’s just so hard to not think about the end result when really you should be focusing on the first few steps.

  • You’ve literally articulated all the thoughts I’ve had about self-doubt and failure better than I ever could. You seem incredibly talented and ambitious, but I know it’s all a matter of believing in yourself, which is a million times easier said than done. All I can say is that you’re not alone and once you get cracking, I’m sure you’ll do amazing and completely flourish! I’m so glad I stumbled across your blog – I kept wanting to just comment ‘yes yes yes!’ on all your posts because they struck such a chord with me xxx

    • Lauren says:

      Oh wow, thank you so much for such lovely compliments! Maybe we can be each other’s backer – believe in each other to achieve what we want! 🙂 xx

  • Tara Curtis says:

    Yes. So much truth here! I believe that you are not alone in this boat, so many people have fears of failure, so they never get around to their dreams. We have to start somewhere though, which is what you are doing! Keep up the momentum and you will get there! Keep us posted on your progress!
    T.

  • Quinn says:

    “My self-doubt is a fast mover.”
    Hello darkness, my old friend… Seriously, this is me all over. Want to start some sort of accountability club where we set goals with each other and then HAVE to meet them before the next online club meeting?

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