1. Never question anything
Keep your reservations about all topics to yourself, as it is obviously just how things are done and who are you to speak up? You may as well cut out any potential hassle you might get and go with the flow.
2. Never get curious
You can live your life the way that you see all around you, and you can get into a routine that never has to change. Why change? This type of life is probably going to be completely satisfactory, or at least you will reach contentment with it one day. No reason for you to wonder whether the grass is greener in a different job, or with a different person, or in different surroundings.
3. Do as you are told
Let other, clearly stronger and more courageous people, dictate how you should do things. Let this behaviour start at school and ensure to never question any type of authority as you grow older through the years. Seems like a lot of confrontation and stress could happen if you get your own voice.
4. Do as expected of you
Go to school. Go to college. Go to university. Get a job. Work your 40 hours a week. Climb a career ladder (at a steady pace, let’s not get ambitious here!) Get a few promotions. Get a heavier work load. Get married. Buy a house. Pay your mortgage til you are 70. Have a couple of kids. Keep working. Have a couple of holidays here and there – you know, the regular places; Florida, a bit of Europe, all-inclusive holidays where everybody speaks English. Retire.
There’s only one type of life, and you can live it.
5. Stay on one path
Seeing as you have learnt how to do that one particular skill, and you have stayed in this one particular company, you may as well keep tallying up your years of loyalty. Have you ever heard of someone from Accounting jacking in their job and studying meditation in some beautiful exotic place halfway across the globe? Let’s be realistic here. Best off to stay doing the same thing you have been trained to do your whole life.
6. Don’t try to learn anything new
Will it come in use one day? Highly unlikely. Learning a language is barely necessary – as you know that on the holidays you have been on, pretty much everyone has some sort of grasp of English. Learn to write? But you can write. You write a lot of documents everyday in your job. Learn to play an instrument? Expensive and time-consuming. It’s not like you would ever gain anything from it. Best to remain unremarkable with the same skill set you’ve always had.
7. Think about doing something you want to, but never even try
You could wonder what it would be like to start your own business, become a vlogger, get into photography. But dreaming about something is enough. Quit the dream before you have even started it.
8. Be the person you think other people want you to be
Keep all that weirdness in, and be a regular Joe. Please everybody by being the person that you think they expect you to be.
9. Stay quiet
Loud equals opinions! Opinions equal personality! Personality equals something that makes you stand out. Blend like you were Kim Kardashian’s make up artist.
10. Take up only normal hobbies, that everybody else does
Go to the gym every now and again. Watch a lot of TV. Read a book before bed. Keep it limited to the usual things – best bet is to look at a couple of dating profiles, they tend to have the same sort of hobbies listed on every single one.
11. Live repetitively
Monday – Friday; wake-up, go to work, come home, eat dinner, watch TV, go to bed. Saturday; go to the gym, do some chores, go shopping, go for a drink at the pub. Sunday; repeat Saturday except subtract gym and add roast dinner. Repeat this process each week, every month. This may be interrupted by birthdays, some social events, plus Easter and Christmas break. But if you live the same way every week, you should be able to manage a life of complete average-ness.