When my previous blog posts pop up as recommended reading (when I am previewing new posts), I barely recognise them. In fact, I often cringe at them.
I used to write things like:
“Remember to not put too much pressure on yourself to get better. You’ll get better when you are ready to.” (Small Steps To Taking Back Control Of Your Life)
“No longer am I going to let sadness take over my brain, take over my actions, or take over my day. What happened to me wasn’t my fault, no matter what some people say.” (How I Will Turn Sadness Into Something Better)
“However impossible it may seem, you can be in control of how you feel. It just takes a little step into the right direction for a happier mindset and a happier you.” (8 Things To Remember When Doubting Yourself)
Now I barely write. The last few blog posts have been cop-outs – minimal writing or writing that isn’t about me. I’m struggling to engage with this blog anymore, struggling to present myself.
This blog is no longer my confidant. It’s not who I am, where I want to be. It feels like a different person.
I’ve changed a lot I suppose. Things have gotten harder and easier and better and worse. Things are changing (again, always).
This blog doesn’t matter to many, doesn’t make much difference to anything, but I’ll keep it. It might change, I might delete some of my old voice, but most of it will stay.
I hope that with the new direction in which my life is going, this blog will follow. Maybe we will be friends again.